Saturday, December 25, 2004

"He probably misses his old glasses."

Unlike Paul McCartney, I'm not having a wonderful Christmas time.

Since I had nothing to do today, I planned to sit home all day, and enjoy Christmas Eve watching the piles of DVDs that have accumulated to the side of my television. I was excited about it (I even decided I was going to call it "Xmas DeVeD.) So last night, after celebrating Christmas Eve Eve with some friends, I decided to get started on the second disc of Simpsons Season 5, I fell asleep during "Boy Scoutz N the Hood". I awoke at 7:40am, with the animated menu looping, and the lights still on. as I did my usual morning eye rub, I heard a popping sound, and I realized so were my glasses.

I removed my glasses to find that one arm just snapped right off. Excellent. Merry freakin' Christmas.

So I realized that my Xmas DeVeD celebration was shot. Over the years, my eyesight has gotten worse. So bad I couldn't sit on my couch, and comfortably watch the television, located less than 5 feet away.

Now, this wasn't the first time this happened. I last purchased a pair of glasses in July of 2003, when I still had optical insurance. I lost it last year, and didn't get my annual pair of new glasses.

In April, I went to go see my friend Joe wrestle his first actual professional wrestling match, and during the undercard, my glasses couldn't take it anymore, and (probably due to the immense pressure exerted on them by my huge head) the spring in the arm snapped off.

Thanks to the 1 year warranty, the fine folks at Lenscrafters gave me a new pair at a discounted price. Well, they were all fine folks, except for the creepy foreign guy who told me I had a large head.

Anyway, this morning, I planned to leave as soon as possible and to get to Lenscrafters, so I can quickly get my new glasses and see how much of Xmas DeVeD I can save.

This was all perfect timing by the way, as I am now a staffed employee of the BBC, and I get health insurance, including optical insurance. But none of it kicks in until January 1, 2005. So I had to hope that my warranty is still good.

Well, after about a half hour, I fell right back asleep. My little sister came down to wake me at five to noon, and I took a quick shower, and ran down to Lenscrafters.

I told the fine folks there about my predicament, and they quickly checked the stock to see if they had another pair of my frames in stock.

And they didn't. They told me the deal that since I had purchased my first pair of glasses in July of 2003, the warranty expired in July of 2004. Regardless of the fact that I had to pay a reduced price after my first pair broke. So if they didn't have a pair of frames that would fit my lenses, I would have to purchase a whole new pair. At full price. With no insurance covering it. Damn it.

Suddenly, the manager came over to tell me that the Lenscrafters at 68th and 3rd had a pair of frames in stock! It was a Christmas Miracle!

I took a $10 cab ride over there to find out that they while they did have a pair of frames in stock, but they weren't the same color. Instead of the sold goldish metal, the were tortoise shell, sorta like the glasses your old grandmother would wear.

Now, it's not that noticeable , but it bothers me. And it costs $170. Yippee.

Suddenly, I noticed that there is a 30 day money back guarantee . If I was unsatisfied with my glasses for any reasons, I can get a full refund within 30 days! Hallelujah! In a week, I will once again have optical insurance, and I can get a brand new pair of glasses for free! And I can get my $170 back!

But for the next week of my life, I have these glasses I hate. So no pictures please.

Except for the one at top.